Checkmates The Bishop by Evolved Novelties - Review

Checkmates “The Bishop” by Evolved Novelties is a “discreet” personal vibrator. It’s very simple, and sleek, although it’s not very powerful.  But that’s not to say that “The Bishop” isn’t a worthwile vibe.

Overall the design is pretty nice. I’m not a fan of the bright purple color. But since there are only two choices, Barney purple and bubble gum pink, I can’t complain too much. The shape of “The Bishop” is very reminiscent of Lelo toys, which is always a good thing.

My favorite thing about the design of “The Bishop” is that it has no branding. Once you remove the vibe from its rigid plastic container, you’re greeted to a spare and sophisticated design that’s not cluttered by logos and other unwanted accoutrement.

Just like the rest of the design, the controls are extremely simple. Changing the speed, turning the device on, and changing the batteries is as simple as a turn of the handle. However, until you get acquainted with the device, that simplicity is a bit of a detriment. Without any labeling of what does what, I had to fumble around looking for a button and then watch the demo video on Eden Fantasys before I figured out how it worked. (Just an FYI, Eden Fanatsys is our sponsor and provides us with free sex toys, for review purposes.)

Build quality is usually one of my biggest gripes with sex toys. But in the case of “The Bishop,” Evolved Novelties has found a way to make a device that costs $28.99 yet, in your hand, feels like the $100+ vibes. It is really quite remarkable how well “The Bishop” is put together. All the seams are smooth to the touch, and invisible when in use.  They even managed to make the device completely waterproof, which I tested by dunking it a sink full of water for about 20 minutes.

“The Bishop” is made from hard plastic, which is a low maintenance material. The satin finish makes the relatively cheap material feel very upscale and is a principle part of the high quality feel of the vibe.  It runs on a single AAA battery, which lasted about 6 hours in my testing.

Although, I’ve raved about Bishop thus far, I’m going to have to take a step back when discussing the performance. When it comes to vibration I live a firm, concentrated vibration. But, like the Bzzz Buddies vibe I reviewed a few weeks ago, “The Bishop” just does not do it for me. The vibration is light and nearly invisible when used internally.

The vibration may not have done much for me, but the shape definitely did. I really enjoyed using this vibe anally. The bulging chess piece like body offered some great textured stimulation. If Evolved Novelties made “The Bishop” longer and added a flared base, this could easily be my new favorite to for anal play. However, it is short and lacks a flared base, which could lead to the toy moving too far into the body and causing issues. I found myself really worried about that, which distracted from the play.

Although it’s not very powerful, it is very quiet. When it was in use, a little bit of music covered the sound completely.  If you want to use it without having to mask the sound, I would be surprised if someone could hear it through a door in a house that’s completely silent.  It really is that quiet, which is a welcomed change after the absurdly loud Bzzz Buddies vibe I mentioned earlier.

Overall Checkmates The Bishop by Evolved Novelties is a darn good vibrator. The $28.99 price tag is a bit high for a device this small. But if you are looking for a pretty, sleek, and sophisticated vibe that gives you a premium design and build quality without robbing you blind, it’s definitely worth a look.