Gross! I smelled semen scented cologne secretions magnefiques. It was the worst thing that has ever happened to me

It takes a special type of person to run a website like this one. A person who, for whatever reason, doesn’t mind being subjected to all types of torture so you don’t have to. Well my latest bit of torture… Secretions Magnefiques. It is a French stank that is meant to smell of… well, bodily secretions; specifically secretions such as breast milk, semen, or blood. I cannot lie to you and say that I was not intrigued. When its distributor LuckyScent.com makes such lofty claims as, “…some consider this a masterpiece of modern perfumery,” how could you not?

I waited for about a week with curious optimism and when the package came I was all set to smell such an olfactory ballet… only to find myself retching uncontrollably for about 5 minutes after one whiff of this vile scent. I immediately put it away and began to furiously scrub my hand to get the smell out. I hate to tell you that it lasted through 7 minutes of scrubbing with Irish Spring and was still strong enough to force me to hold my hand away from my face for the rest of the evening.

After a few days I found myself curious about how others perceived this stank… mainly to see the 2 girls 1 cup type of reactions. So I went about having people try the scent on me, and I try it on them, and they try it on them. I must say that I was furiously shocked and slightly disheartened when no one else had such a violent negative reaction as I did. In fact, the general consensus was that it smelled wonderful. I was even asked by three people if they could have my bottle.

It was only after careful consideration that I remember that I really do not like the smell or taste of semen, and I dislike the way breast milk and blood smell, but I like their taste. So it would make sense that this would smell how I imagine death to smell.

While I can in no way recommend this product, as I don’t want to smell it ever again, I will say that it is a strange and interesting product. If you’re as odd as me and this has piqued your interest you can check out its product page and spend $3 on the sample to see how your friends react.